Akatsuki Spelar Dota
by elric0sis
Summary: Basically the Akatsuki go to a Gay Bar. Itachi sings, Hidan and Deidara strips, and there is a weird pervert ninja, enjoy! YAOI FIC!


AU: Yay! another drabble based off of a song! ......I really need to keep writing on my other stories but I keep getting ideas for other stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is a little mature but don't let the begining get you! You just might be surprised!!!!! NO HARD YAOI!!!!!!! Enjoy!  
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE SONG OR NARUTO!!!!!!  
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Spelar Dota (3:21) Basshunter

The Akatsuki were bored at the base one night so they decided to go to a local hot spot called, "The Singing Pole". Can you guess what it was? Yup, it was a local dancing-strip joint. Don't ask how they came up with that. Let's just say that it was Madara's turn to pick the place. So the Akatsuki got dressed and went out.

Hidan was wearing a pair of super tight spandex pants that were neon blue. He wore a light, white undershirt with his Jashin rosary on top and black tear drops under each eye. His hair was slicked back and he was in the mood to party. Kakuzu was a little better, but not much. He wore dark green jeans with a checkered shirt and a bandana over his mouth. He was about to put on a big, purple, wide rimmed hat when Hidan saw him. "You are not wearing a (BEEPING) pimp hat!" Kakuzu sighed and put his hat back down, settleing for a necklace with a money sign on it.

Deidara was wearing a pair of super tight spandex pants that were neon yellow. Apparently he and Hidan wanted to stand out. He wore a black undershirt with black converses. He had his signature ponytail on top of his head and he painted two black triangles under his eyes. Sasori wore black pants that had a silver chain coming from his pocket to the back of his pants with a purple shirt with a yellow racing stripe across it. He combed his hair out to the side of his face, making him look a little emo. He huffed then followed his bouncing lover out of the room.

Tobi wore his "Good Boy" pants, which were basically a pair of rainbow colored tights covered in sparkles. He wore neon green shoes and a neon pink shirt with a rainbow on the front of it. His mask was tightly on his face and his black, spiky hair had rainbow sparkles throughout it. Tobi painted a little red heart onto the side of his mask and giggled. Zetsu on the other hand, wasn't so outgoing. He wore plain black pants and shoes with a white T-shirt. His flytrap was the only real thing that stuck out and he figured that he was going to be in the back of the place the whole time, so it didn't really matter. The two lovers gathered their things and headed out of the room.

Itachi was wearing a pair of plain black skinny jeans and checkered converses. He wore a black T-shirt with a checkered pattern and his regular necklace. His black, shiny hair was pulled into his signature ponytail, the black locks hanging down on his back. Kisame on the other hand was actually a little excited. He wore dark blue jeans with white tennis shoes and a white T-shirt underneath a black leather jacket. His blue hair was spiked in it's normal style with a little bit of gel in it to make it shine. He put his hand around Itachi's waist and they walked out of their room.

Konan was going full-out for this night. She wore a black mini skirt with white trimmings and a tight, leather shirt that showed a generous amount of cleavage. She wore black high heels that lit up when she walked and a sparkly black necklace to top it off. Her usual white flower was black and she wore black lipstick. Pein was dressed in white jeans with white dress shoes. He wore a white undershirt with white piercings instead of black. He also threw on a white jacket over his shirt. Madara was the complete opposite of his twin brother Tobi. His whole attire was black. Black tennis shoes, black baggy pants, back undershirt, black choker and black hearts on his cheeks. They all looked at eachother and left at the same time.

After meeting in the living room, laughing at everyone and getting money from Kakuzu, the Akatsuki finally left for the dance club. Once they arrived, they went through the doors in the front and were met by blinding lights and loud music. They all smiled and went to go enjoy themselves.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(A couple of hours later)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

The Akatsuki sat at a round table in the back of the club, laughing and drinking. Madara, Zetsu and Pein were drunk out of their minds and were singing, badly, random tunes that they thought of. Everyone else was pretty much laughing at their 'superiors' that were usually calm and stotic, sometimes even throwing the bar peanuts at the singers. Deidara stopped laughing and turned to Hidan, whispering something in his ear. Hidan smiled and said, loud enough for the rest to hear, "Sure Deidara! I'll go strip with you! But who will we get to sing the song for us for free?" Almost every eye at the table turned to Itachi. Everyone knew that Itachi had an amazing voice and, surprisingly, he liked to sing. Itachi sighed and looked at them, then said "Fine. BUT I am NOT going to strip. I am just there to sing the song." Hidan and Deidara's grins pratically blinded half of the club.

They dragged the poor weasel to the DJ and told him what they wanted to do. The DJ nodded and announced them. "Ladies and Gentlemen! We have two volunteer show men for your pleasure tonight! AND a requested singer and song! Now please give a shout otu to Hidan, Deidara, and Itachi!!!!!!!!!" The club echoed in shouts as Deidara and Hidan took center stage. Itachi took the microphone to the side of the stage and signaled the DJ to start playing the sing "Spelar Dota" By Basshunter. The music started and the three got to work. Itachi started singing as the two started to dance.

Deidara twirled around and the crowd cried out. He started with the hem of his shirt and lifted it over his head and threw it to the crowd. He started to run his hands over his chest and muscles, earning cries from the crowd and a major nosebleed from Sasori.

Hidan grabbed the nearest pole to him and started ripping off his shirt. Literally. The stitches down the middle came out and he waved it over his head like some trophy that he won. Then he threw the two pieces into the crowd where screaming fanboys caught and smelled the clothing. Kakuzu was suffering from a drowning nosebleed.

Itachi kept singing along with the song, occasionally looking at his lover. Kisame was just beaming at seeing his uke up singing. Itachi kept singing, even shaking his hips to the beat. Soon, some random dude started eyeing HIS Itachi like he was some sort of eye candy. Then the punk actually started to cut some of his angel's clothes off!!!! Itachi was shocked. How could someone do that, on stage, and not get caught?! The ninja took out a kunai and started to cut Itachi's pants into shorts, one slice at a time. Itachi couldn't stop singing, he was caught in some sort of jutsu!

Hidan and Deidara couldn't stop dancing to help Itachi. Somehow, this ninja figured out how to make them dance against their will! Kisame and the rest of the Akatsuki tried to make their way through the crowd but were being blocked by the people cheering the ninja on. Itachi was actually starting to freak out a little. 'I can't stop! I need help!!!!!' The ninja got right up to Itachi and started cutting more off.

When Kisame finally made it up to the front of the stage almost all three of them were naked. Hidan and Deidara were down to their boxers and the crowd were cheering like crazy. But poor Itachi, the ninja had cut his clothes so much that he was reduced to short shorts and a third of a shirt. His hair tie had been cut so his long locks were down, framing his face. The ninja laughed, "Now my pretty, what should I cut next? Your top? Or maybe your shorts?" The ninja smirked and advanced just as Kisame jumped onto the stage. The ninja turned around as Kisame's fist connected with his face, shattering his nose and other bones. "Don't you EVER get near MY Itachi AGAIN!!!" Kisame said and actually ripped the guy in half. The jutsus ceased and the three were free to move on their own.

Kisame turned to Itachi and gave him his jacket to wear. Itachi gave a shaky nod and was led away by Kisame. Sasori and Kakuzu gave their ukes back their clothes and picked them up, carrying them off the stage. Boos and shouts were heard throughout the club as the Akatsuki left. They arrived back at their base and as the Semes were passing through the door way, Kakuzu picked Madara up by his collar. "We aren't done with you. We'll be back shortly." he growled out. Madara audibly swallowed.

Kisame led Itachi back to their room, shutting the door behind them. Itachi was still a little shaky as he changed his clothes into a new pair of boxers. Kisame sat on their bed, rubbing his temples. They go out for a night of fun and something like this happens! He sighed and Itachi walked over to him. Kisame looked up and Itachi crawled into his lap, placing his nose on Kisame's neck, inhaling the shark's scent. Kisame blushed a little and stroked the shaking weasel's hair. Itachi soon fell asleep in the shark's arms and Kisame carried him to the front of the bed, tucking him in and kissing his forehead. "I'll be backa little later Ita-koi." Kisame whispered and walked out the door. He had a bone to pick with Madara.

Sasori carried his sleeping uke into their bedroom, dressing him in his pajamas. He set the bomber on their bed and kissed his cheek. Deidara mumbled something then turned over, snuggling into the puppet's pillow. Sasori blushed a little by looking at his uke then left the room, quietly closing the door. His face suddenly turned dark. Madara will pay.

Kakuzu carried his uke into their room. Hidan was actually silent the whole time, thinking about what had just happened. "Hidan, are you ok?" Kakuzu asked in a worried tone. "Hm? O-oh ya......I'm fine." Hidan replied, hopping straight into bed, still a little disturbed. Kakuzu sighed then left the machonist to his thoughts. He closed their bedroom door and cracked his knuckles. Madara is dead.

All three of them gathered in the living room where Madara was watching T.V. They walked up to him, turned off the T.V., and glared at him. Madara gulped "H-Hey guys! What's up?" He said nervously. Kisame slammed his hand into his throat and held him against the wall behind him. Madara chocked and looked at the other three in fear. It seemed that the alchol was taking it's effect on his behavior. Sasori glared at him, "You knew that something like this would happen, DIDN'T YOU???" he yelled. Madara just looked away and ignored him. "What kind of sick game are you playing you bastard! Our ukes almost got raped because of your stupid idea!" Kakuzu snarled. Madara glared at him, not in his right mind. "Yes. I knew something like this would happen. It was a GAY bar for a reason! Almost everyone in there was single and lonely, like me! So I gave them a little entertainment!" Kisame growled and pressed harder onto his neck, making him cough up blood. "So, you think it's AMUSING that MY Itachi-koi almost got RAPED?!?!?! AND that Hidan and Deidara were pratically forced to strip for the crowd?! Just because THE PEOPLE WERE LIKE YOU?!?!?!?!" Kisame yelled.

Madara was seeing stars appear in front of his eyes. With one last breath he passed out. The Semes sighed, Kisame dropping Madara on the floor. As they all started heading back to their ukes, they all had the same thought going through their heads. _'He's gonna die in the morning.'_

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AU: Well! That's all folks! Hope you enjoyed!!!!!


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